Dear Journal:

A start to a great weekend? Who knows. Well, I must say that it's shaping up to be good. I went and bought some cigarettes. And Beth is going to get me some too. So I'll be set for a while. I'm not sure if I should smoke the one's that Beth's bringing me... They're Newports and I haven't smoked a 'port in eons. I'm not sure how I'll handle it, but a cigarette's a cigarette... as long as it's mentholated.

Brandon came up to me at the end of sixth hour (today for me, but technically it was Friday) to apologize for being an "asshole" and what not. I wasn't expecting that. I was expecting some snide, nasty comment. But times change and so do people.. I think?

Anyways. I talked with Zackie Poo last night. I'm not sure exactly what happened (I really wasn't very coherent) but it ended in heated depression. I'm not sure what's going on.

I went to the movie's with Heather this evening. We went and say, "Don't Say A Word" I do believe is what it's called. It was an awesome movie! I haven't been on the edge of my seat in a while shout-whipsering the actors words of encouragement like, FUCK YEAH BABY! BEAT HIS SKULL IN! and stuff like that. It was just great!! And for a thriller kind of movie, it had an awesome ending. Most of those kinds of movies end really shitty, but this one was great.

Anyways. When I got home, Heather noticed her car was smoking. Turns out that she has a leak in one of the pipes that sends coolant throughout the engine and other major parts that NEED it. It will be fixed tomorrow. She was really upset! I hope she'll be better.

Yeah, and while I was standing outside my house with Heather trying to figure out what was wrong with her car while my dad was on the phone, Karen called. I told her that it was a bad time and shit and that I'd call her back as soon as I could. So I called her when I got to Bevies and she told me the emergency. Turns out Zack was thinking some pretty horrendous things. Like overdosing and shit like that. She said that he had told her he would overdose (don't know on what) at 1 in the morning. I really couldn't understand her after she told me this because my mind instantly set on Zackie Poo wondering if he would be online or what not so I could speak with him about this. Maybe Karen told me that someone had talked him out of it, but I'm not sure. I don't think I'll be able to sleep tonight knowing what's going on with him. Or the lack of knowing. Either way, I'll lose sleep, but I'm sure it will be worth it. Because friend's are worth it. Friends pick you back up when life throws you down. Hey, what a great insightful comment.

Anyways. I sent him an e-mail and stuff and I am hoping he will be online. I'm not so sure he will be, but I think I'll stay up just a bit later to see if that's a possibility (which I'm hoping it is).

Okay. I'm going to go now and wait for Zack while downloading something that really isn't needed or what not and playing Solitare.

Love doesn't ask why. It speaks from the heart and never explains. Oh, don't you know that love doesn't think twice; it can come all at once or whisper from a distance. Don't ask me if this feeling's right or wrong. Doesn't have to make much sense. Just has to be this strong. Because when you're in my arms I understand we don't have a voice when our hearts make the choices; there's no plan. It's not in our hands. Now I can feel what you're afraid to say. If you give your soul to me, will you give too much away? And we can make this moment pass us by, can't question this chance, or expect any answers. We can try. Baby we can try! So let's take what we've found and wrap it around us.. Love doesn't ask you why. It speaks from the heart. Don't you know? Don't you know? Love.... Love doesn't ask why. It speaks from the heart and NEVER explains. Don't you know that love doesn't think twice; it comes all at once or whispers from a distance. Love... it just doesn't ask you why.

Good Night!